A large part of parenting lies in not pretending to perfect, in admitting one can’t always be both father and mother, and in not trying too hard to be everything. Being a single parent doesn’t mean to do whatever ideal to your child. However the part of child’s development is important than any other problem.
One issue that probably needs to be underlined is that children of single parents do not develop behavior problems attributable to their parent’s single status. This needs emphasizing because most single parents go through life feeling guilty and anxious about their parenting. It is indeed dangerous and unfair to generalize that children of single parents are usually maladjusted with emotional and behavior problems.
In fact, the one fact that did emerge many cases is that children of single parents mature faster, are more sensitive and show a sense of emotional responsibility to their parents which is slower to emerge in children of two-parent families. Rather early in their school years children do become conscious of social barrier that go with having a single mother or father. For example, Mum can’t drive to birthday parties far away, she refuses to let her 16 years old son go on school trek, Dad doesn’t understand why make-up is a must.
A frequent complaint is over protectiveness and favoritism: “Dad loves may sister more simply because she looks like my Mum.” Children as young as four years of age can sense there is something “different” about family structure. It is difficult to explain to very young children why Mum or Dad is absent. Frank discussions that go a long way in easing parent-child relationships are possible only with older children. The younger child tends to react to the absence of one parent by developing behavior problems.
Parenting is closely linked to the family system which is a structure of great permanence. Once that is threatened, it takes away from children the feeling of security and emotional well-being. It is wrong to assume that single parents can’t be good mother and father. What counts is how well they succeed in creating a sense of family against all odds.
Studies conducted by a research institute in Copenhagen show that even 15 and 16 years olds consider family to be the top priority in their life. For them, family doesn't have to do with providing economic support but with having someone on whose shoulder they can cry on. Maybe the children of single parents don’t really have a childhood, they grow up fast, and become old very fast.